andthenewt:

pocketcucco:

okay now I will share an embarrassing story with you all for sleepover saturday

a while back I went to a gift shop and I saw a basket of these

image

and I was like oh shit I love bouncy balls!! so I grabbed one and threw it on the ground

well

turns out these ones were not bouncy balls and were actually made of glass

omg im actually laughing so hard it hurts

(via superturnip)

ironyofchokingonjacksdick:

A sentence I never thought I would read

  • baby: m-mm ma... m
  • magneto: mommy?
  • baby: mutant supremacy
  • magneto: good
until-theskyturnsgreen:

Rules to live by
From Glue by Irvine Welsh

the-birdlady:

my family and friends trying to get me to leave the house

image

(Source: droqo, via breakingrad-bitch)

fagonfly:

hey if u have a DS u should add my friend code !!! i am playing pokemon XY and AC:NL !! 1934-0859-9164

and message me urs pls and thank u !!

hey if u have a DS u should add my friend code !!! i am playing pokemon XY and AC:NL !! 1934-0859-9164


  • Gf: babe come over
  • Me: I'm eating garlic bread
  • Gf: I'm horny and my parents aren't home
  • Me: it's the kind that's covered in cheese

narcotic:

parents: i want the truth

me: *tells truth*

parents: nope youre lying wrong answer

(Source: narcotic, via notiero)